the influences and judgements

in one moment i saw myself mature. i thought it impossible to see oneself mature, but i saw it. i went from little girl who takes the shit boys dish out to realizing how it really makes me feel- worthless, and i used my self will and pushed myself out of the realm of little girl, to lady who will act respectfully, polite but demand respect also. it was an amazingly liberating experience. i feel too young to learn this.. and yet i've always acted older than my age, i was forced too.. now the forcing is on my own doing, and it feels soo good. i may not be bullet proof of the experiences i know i will go through, but at least i have my first sifter when accepting dates.. and not only for the guys, for me too.. how to act.. it was really a scary moment but an amazing aftermath.

i had love story by taylor swift in my head all day. its just too cute, to not love.. the shivers every girl gets when she listens to it.. whether she admits it or not. walking home in the cold dark kinda scary street of toronto i live on.. i sang the chorus outloud to myself, and smiled shivered and giggled.. music can make or take the happiness of your days passing. amazing.